spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
In America we eat man semen.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
