Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
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