That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
