I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Randomize
