should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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