If that was your dad, he is hot
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
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