dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
There r osticjed everywhere
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
