awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize