I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Randomize