yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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