Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
