the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
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I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
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God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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