In the future we'll all be gay
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize