i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Randomize
