I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize