he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I need water and some morals
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Randomize
