What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize
