That's intense
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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