That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
