remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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