They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.