After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
