Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
