I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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