Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Randomize
