I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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