The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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