I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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