What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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