chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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