dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
