What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
