I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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