Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize