your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
