is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Blood and glitter go together right?
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
