I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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