so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
