I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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