We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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