I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Randomize
