it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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