you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
