I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize