Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
