then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize