dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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