Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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