Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
