Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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